In her first yoga class, Glennon Doyle Melton was shocked to learn that the two opposing forces pushing onto her body at the same time make her stand straight and strong.
Mind-blowing discovery. The goal is not to avoid the pressure. Neither it is to succumb to either of the forces. However, if we direct the two forces against one another, an interesting balance can be achieved. And that balance, seemingly contradictory, can hold the solution for our perplexing problems.
The entire self-help industry is based on helping us solve our problems. A lot of their advice makes sense. Some are research-based and therefore should be more reliable. A lot of this stuff works really well until it doesn’t. And when the rug is pulled from underneath our feet, we start wondering why the renowned recipe did not work. And the problem is usually not the recipe itself, but our idea that complex situations can be solved by recipes, hacks, 3-step, 5-day challenges and all these kinds of things.
I became very cautious of everyone who claims that life is simple, and offers simple solutions to life’s big questions. Based on my experience, there are no simple, universal solutions. Except for being kind and loving to everyone, there is not one type of action that is equally good in all situations and for everyone. One size does not fit all and it never will.
Life is complex and ambiguous and confusing. Things often don’t make sense. The exactly opposite notions are often true at the same time. And we need to be wise enough to accept them as such. We need to create enough space in our souls to be able to embrace the contradictions.
Therefore I wrote this confusing post. I gave a whole bunch of examples of harnessing the two opposing forces in order to become a balanced, better person. They differ from the conventional wisdom, but I believe they are more realistic and applicable. Too much of either force will turn you into something you don’t want to be. What’s more, when you push too far on one side, the solution is often not to keep pushing, but to try something different. There is a quality in both approaches, however not in too much of either one. We need to recognize it. We need to see things differently. I hope these examples can help. Here we go.
Once you look throug all of the paradoxical seesaws, please write in the comments below which one resonated with you the most. Where have you been pushing too hard on one side, and could use a little bit of the opposite energy?
Before you go
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